I heart the Cubs/Ninjas!

http://www.azstarnet.com/sports/174627.php


Baseball
Spring training
Cubs closer has goals: save 50 games, learn to use nunchucks
Dempster wants to be ninja; will he come to his senseis?
By Sarah Trotto
Arizona Daily Star
Tucson, Arizona Published: 03.21.2007


Ryan Dempster says he is training to be a ninja.
He says this with a straight face, claiming he has trained with a sensei in Vancouver.
"You have to (learn) how to throw a throwing star and nunchucks and all those kinds of things," the Chicago Cubs closer says. "Obviously you've got to do martial arts and learn how to be really quiet, which is a tough task for me because I talk a lot."
It is difficult to tell when the 29-year-old right-hander is joking. He does not smile or laugh once.
Humor is one of his favorite hobbies. He has practiced stand-up comedy. He impersonates late Cubs broadcaster Harry Caray. And Tuesday afternoon at Hi Corbett Field, he claimed he wanted to be a ninja.
"It's pretty cool. I wear the outfit around the house and try to sneak up on people," Dempster deadpanned before the Cubs lost to the Colorado Rockies 4-2.
So how does one train to be a ninja anyway?
"You can read books," Dempster explained. "I watch a lot of the movies. You go through different senseis."
Why would anyone want to be a ninja?
"I always liked the ninja movies when I was growing up," Dempster said. "That's about it."
The hilarity continued after Dempster pitched a scoreless inning against the Rockies. He allowed a hit and a walk in his first outing in a week after dealing with a knot in his shoulder.
"I think it should be mandatory for me every year," Dempster quipped about taking a week off. He went on to say he felt good and fresh, and that he would be ready to pitch today if it were opening day.
Not so fast — Dempster has thrown only five innings, posting a 1.80 ERA.
Told of Dempster's assertion that he could pitch today if it were opening day, Cubs manager Lou Piniella took his turn at being funny.
"It's going to be 86 degrees in Cincinnati, too," Piniella said. "We're going to be drinking piña coladas. Yeah.
"He needs a little more work."
But in all seriousness, the Cubs have been pleased with Dempster's performance this spring and they have confidence in him rebounding from last season's 1-9 record and 4.80 ERA.
"Dempster is going to be our closer. We haven't deviated from that," Piniella said. "We just have to get a little more work in between now and the end of spring training."
An 0-2 mark with a 6.57 ERA in September especially marred Dempster's 2006 season.
"There weren't a lot of opportunities," he said. "And when I did get them I didn't do my job, and there were games I was getting work and not getting guys out.
"Strike one, I wasn't throwing that very often."
Dempster said he lost nearly 25 pounds in the off-season by cutting out sweets, breads and red meat. He and his wife, Jenny, ate meals delivered to their home.
"I have a sweet tooth," Dempster said. "I could never work in a Hershey's factory. I'd eat everything in there. I've disciplined myself.
"When you eat at home you know what's in the food. When you go to the restaurant, as good as it tastes, you never know what it's smothered in."
Dempster also has changed his approach and gained confidence by pitching more aggressively, unlike toward the end of last season.
"My command has been good and I've been trying to attack guys and be very aggressive. I found myself being very passive toward the end of last year, almost pitching away from contact and I've been my best when I've gone after people," he said.
He has also set a goal of 50 saves this season. He did not laugh or smile. So maybe he is serious?
"It means we're winning a lot of ballgames," he said, displaying a small grin.

It's Doctor Ninja to you Bitches!

Flordia Pictures

Right after my last rotation, Mike and I took off to Flordia to be with my family. Here's a few pictures.



Mike and I getting ready to golf with my grandparents and the gators!

One of the gators that tried to eat me while golfing!

Me attempting to golf!

Me and Mike at the Magic Kingdom

Mike getting ready to race at the Nascar go-carts iat the Magic Kingdom

A super sweet ninja at MGM during the Indiana Jones stunt show!

Mike and I at Epcot

Me and pirate before mini-golfing

My sister, Megan, and me mini- golfing

Mike preparing for me to kick his ass

Me kicking Mike's ass at mini-golf

Valentine's Day

Mike and I celebrated Valentine's day early since he would have to be out of town. He took me to my favorite resturant Hiway Harry's. Then we decided to go to HoChuck casino. I usually do not go crazy style and waste too much money, but this time I was out of control! I was down $100 in like 45 minutes. Mike was still playing so I decided to use the potty. I was just about to sit down when some old lady was all like "can somebody help me". I was like what the jazz! People were laughing and I could hear them leaving. Mind you I was in the back bathroom where there wasn't a lot of traffic. I was like shit I better see if she's dying. So I ask if she's ok. She says I just need help up. I told her she'd have to wait while I took care of my business. A million thoughts went through my head...is she on the floor covered in shit...yada yada yada? So I go down to her stall where her giant hoover round is parked in the door way I look in and here's this huge ass old black lady on the stool with her depends down. I had no idea how I was going to get her up. She told me to lift her by her armpits...so I did and about bust my back out I swear. While I was helping her up she was saying at the top of her lungs "you're so strong!" I was like shut the hell up since people were now in the bathroom wondering what was going on. I come out of the stall to a lot of weird looks, wash my hands, and go find Mike. I tell Mike my story and he was like ummm ok....that's all I got from him. I wanted to yell at him "Hey I just helped a huge ass lady off the stool give me something...like a that was nice of you or a high five! Anyway...me believing in krama thought it was a good idea to get money out of the ATM and see if I could win now. I played for less than 10 minutes and won $200. Man I wish I could give that lady in the bathroom a high five!